Relativity Theoretician Pillows

'Guy comes up with one interesting theory about special relativity, suddenly he thinks he's freakin' Einstein,'

"Notice how Dad ages faster at relativistic speeds?"

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

'No, dear. I don't think the star on the Christmas tree will implode, and suck our living room into a black hole.'

"I've thought about retiring, but there's a great deal of gravity under this chair."

The Quantum Mechanic...

'I've overcome my fears of personal mortality and the indifference of the Universe, but I'm still a little worried about those skip-tracers.'

When a nanosecond is forever.

Relativity explained; the woman on the train will always appear more attractive than the woman on the platform.

'Flying fish? - I TOLD you there was too much background radiation down there!'

"Oh, yes, I've been good...relatively speaking!"

Astronomers argue theories of the Universe.

conclusive proof that the Moon landings WERE faked...

To an observer approaching the speed of light, Einstein and his surroundings appear to be tall and thin.

Einstein Discovers That Time is Actually Laundry

"How do I get off this Merry Go Round?"

I can see why we don't stand up!

'Naught or nice? Compared to whom: Lance Armstrong? Roger Clemens?'

If time is money, why the hell isn't space money?