Relationship Comics Pillows

"Oh, my arthurs a breeder too, contempt mainly!"

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

WHIRLWIND COURTSHIP

'Oh that's weird! i just had a shiver go down my wallet. My wife must have just bought something.'

'I just want to be sure to get this right. You met again your imaginary childhood friend and then happened WHAT?'

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'

'I'm leaving my wife because of another woman. Her mother.'

'Let's face it...We have irreconcilable differences!'

"I'm sorry your wife doesn't understand you, but this is a dry cleaner's."

'Actually thursday'll be a perfect time to come by Penny. That way you'll finally get the chance to meet my other half.'

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

'I swear I didn't know you'd heard that joke before...'

"Can I start you all off with my cheesy alimony saga?"

"Of course you don't look anything like your reflection in the mirror."

'I know we're supposed to be Lovebirds, but a bit of privacy from time to time would be nice...'

"This is a good start! You both agree that the marriage needs some new spark!"

'I don't like the look of yours...'

"If you two lovebirds could wrap it up I'd like to pee there please and thank you."

"I dumped my stable companion, he was seeing another pony!"

I was expecting something else when you said nuptial agreement!

"You mean the rumours she dated a Flamingo are true?"

“It’s 2025 Roger, I didn’t think I’d still be seeing the lockdown beard..”

"I picked him up cheap on eBay."

"Are you, Michael on the same page as Melissa?"

'Oh, pretty good. At least I'm not hearing voices telling me what to do anymore. . . got fired and divorced.'

'And I thought I was leaving you.'

'My wife thinks it was a cheap, sordid affair, but she's wrong. The motel cost me fifty dollars and I spent another twenty on the vibrating bed!'

"Mrs. Santa Claus wants a divorce, the elves in my workshop is on strike, the reindeer just hate me and global warming makes my place in the North Pole melt!"

"We did it—nice work today." "Thanks. I look forward to hearing from you soon."

'Simon! No! We really were just fooling around!'

'Sorry, dear, but upon advice from my attorney, I decline to give you an opinion on your Creamed Tarragon Flounder.'

"I should let you know, you accidentally forwarded THAT mail to me."

"Open marriage? All right, open marriage it is!"