Regulation Riddle Solver T-Shirts

"Bless me, Father, for I am out of compliance...."

'Thank goodness the FDA now requires us to number each grape. We were almost caught up around here.'

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

'I'll give you a clue. The answer is a number, not a fruit.'

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

Oedipus

"Dear Diary: Today I picked a peck of pickled peppers."

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

"Here comes Santa! I'm his number one fan!"

Iraq and the road ahead...

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

'It's a real conundrum. Not sure if I should open it, or beat it.'

"It was going to be a high-rise office building. But after three bricks, they ran out of money."

Cryptologists Anonymous

'...Or not.'

"It's all hypothetical, of course, but how much wood do you think you could chuck?"

'What goes ho, ho, ho, plop?'

"Maybe the alignment's off. It's been acting a little buggy."

"Let's just agree to disagree." "I suggested that first!"

"I give up. What's black and white and red all over?"

The European Bailout

'Okay, I give up. What is black,has two wings and fourteen legs?'

'Soon I will have proved it ONCE AND FOR ALL!'

"Miss. you said that a single rabbit could reproduce a hundred times a year? What about a married rabbit?"

"I'm hoping Brexit is going to simplify things for us."

Wordplay: Fertilizer.

"The problem with facts is that they get in the way of ignorance."

"I didn't say WE were going on a double date. I said I was going on a double date."

'This search fee seems very high.'

What's grey, has four legs and a trunk?

Connect the Dots and see what the 2014 political campaigns and/or elections are all about. . .

"Those were the toughest tryouts I've ever had. Everyone has shown great improvement, but I only have one slot open. Congratulations, Gracie! You're the newest member of our academic decathlon team!"

"Your wife probably doesn't understand you because you always sound muffled."

"Of course it's hard to understand. They wouldn't be billing 'codes' , if they were easy to decipher."