Regular Cafe Visits T-Shirts

"I'm thinking of suing your cafe. I just got a $2,000 dental bill. You should be paying for it." "I'm in here every day and I always order your sugary scones and your sugar-filled lattes." "That's why I had twelve cavities!" "I'll settle out of court for a scone and a latte." "No deal."

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

'You've had enough!'

"I'd say business was brisk."

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

Coffee Menu

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

'Know something? Love IS wonderful!'

'Careful, this used to be hot.'

Lunch

"Let's see, now, that's cappuccino, cappuccino, cappuccino, and cappuccino—right?"

Waiter thinks drowning man is asking for 5 beers

'It takes all day to eat it.'

'A sandwich?'

Bookstore-Cafe: Used Book/Day-Old Croissants

"I know, I know — it looks silly, but you can’t imagine how warm I am."

'Dulcifying araneids didn't make them any more sapid.'

Darlene? Rudy? I heard you might be hanging out here. I thought I'd come by just to say hello and see how you're doing. That's nice. Coffee King. I love you. Hence Coffee King. House of Java.

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

I know why you're such a greedy, heartless scrooge, Armstrong. It's because deep down, you just want to be loved. But you're afraid of rejection, so you make yourself as unlovable as possible. That's the type of utter nonsense to expect from muscle-bound oaf who hadn't paid his tab in 13 years. I love you too, man. I hope you get audited.

"Of course, I'm complaining for two now."

Outdoor Dining: Winter Edition

Hipster Coffee

Accordionist at work and in cafe.

Wall St. Café, Happy Hour 24-7.

"Oh, that Jane. I thought you were talking about Jane Austen."

'So how would you like your coffee...Small, Large or Intravenous???'

'Did you ever realize that we're really drinking coffee out of large sippy cups?'

"I knew you'd like this place."

England's Cafe Culture

I'm thinking of suing your caf