Regifter Gifts

Things I've learned...

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

'How effective is this new weight-loss regime?' 'We can guarantee you'll lose £50 at your signing on.'

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

"...it's another metal detector."

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Essex computer.

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

Dissectum Paniculata

"Please excuse the mess. We had a major paradigm shift."

"I'm looking for something that the recipient will be too embarrassed to regift."

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

Peace and Justice Return to the Joint High Commission

Civil Service Reform - Equal Justice for Briber and Bribed

Louis Antoine Jullien

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

The ghost of christmas regifting

"What do you mean I ask too many questions?"

There's no sense talking economic reform with him --- His motto is "If it's not feudal, it's futile."

"Since I don't really know you, I got you something that's easy to regift."

Discounted juice: Contains reconstituted extra profits.

Community Complaints Redress Mechanisms Bureaucracy

Harold pushed the 25 coffee refills to the limit

"Look what I bought at Ofelia's yard sale."

'Loaves and fishes are SO first-century!'

How's my driving? Do you like the color of my cab? What do think of my t-shirt? Should I get a haircut? Grow it out?

'I want romance, passion, love.' - 'Tangible things only, Buddy.'

'Parties, discoteques, pubs... It's hard enough spending all your money without me having to earn it first'!

"We steal gold from the rich and sell it to a metals broker. They make a prfit on their buy and sell spread and share a portion of that with us. Then, after the skimming and the rebates, we give to the poor."

“I keep doing the same thing over and over, but keep getting the same results.”

'It's just not fair! Jenkins got three more 'atta boy' responses in the meeting than I did.'

"I had a yard sale and somebody brought it."

Liberals investigating university revenues

'I am the prison artist in residence, I'm doing time for forgery.'

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