Regal Fitness Challenger T-Shirts

'If it weren't for all the assassination attempts, he wouldn't get ANY exercise.'

"Looks like Harriet mixed her lights and darks again."

Lawnmower

"Fine - you don't want to run in the corporate 5K - I get it. What about the corporate cage fighting team?"

"Yoga helps me unwind."

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

Fast Food Dieter

Empty Calories Vending Machine.

'Not bad. Already 17 minutes into Saturday morning before I receive my first ultimatum.'

The Royal Wii.

Millionaire trapped in the body of a bum. Please help correct the situation. ?

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

"I feel proud of the success I've made, thanks for all your support."

"I don't think there's anything wrong with your fitness watch: It's just that you haven't moved enough to trigger it..."

'How do you propose to repair the roof from down there?!'

'I intend to stay as CEO of this organisation come hell or high cholesterol.'

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

'...and when I did finally take out the trash, she locked the door behind me.'

Please seat to be weighted.

"Alien life-form or not, those dishes won't wash themselves up!"

'What's with my cholesterol problem, Doc - all I eat is grass and grain!'

'The other foot also Mrs Zipsky!'

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

'Young lady, you're not going anywhere until you clean your lint trap!'

"I am exercising. I'm doing some online walking around an online mall."

Spring cleaning.

'...all been inspired by the Olympics...now touch those toes...touch those...'

A man walks with a dog who has learnt to scoop his own poop.

"Is it possible to achieve inner peace and a charley horse at the same time."

'Unfortunately, Mr.Beckons, your son Dean is very allergic to grass. . .'

Unreliable Narrator

"Moving to a chair to eat three times a day really isn't 'doing sit-ups!'"

'What makes you so sure this is good for my health?'

"This is doing nothing for my abs."

'It's the thin person inside you, screaming to get out - I'm afraid he's not alone.'