Reframing Enthusiasts Gifts

“Okay, Cindy, don’t think of it as learning ... think of it as a software upgrade!”

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

'That's it gentlemen, we're broke. Anybody know any good jokes?'

"Your profile said you were a dog."

Welcome Bureaucrats! (Convention of bureaucrats).

Fisherman: 'HOLY MACKEREL!'

'I inherited therefore I am'

See Manhattan . . . By Car!

'Medical researchers discovered that the leading cause of death by aging is due to birthdays.'

"Hey - that new Stephen King film is better than the book!"

Barber Shop in the Coronavirus Age

You spend way too much time and energy stewing over things, Al

Oh, all right. It's a win-win-WIN situation.

"If we all waited for Mr Right to come along the human race would be extinct by now."

Gloria called

Rex would soon discover the eerie similarity between a playful growl and a warning growl.

I'm looking for a man who's not wrapped up in his career. I want his career to be me. I was just imagining working my way up.

"We moved to the sea to get away from the crowd, only to find they'd moved to the sea."

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, Al. I might have found that quote useful if not for my deadly fear of hobgoblins.

"Then, unfortunately, our market launch ran into a brick wall."

"They say you're only as old as your face."

For Witches of a Certain Age

"Does it still qualify as a quorum if half the participants slept through the meeting?"

"No, I'm afraid that doesn't count."

The New York Review of Weather.

Born into the 21st century.

'My agent told me to bring some arm candy.'

"Nothing beats New York for sheer energy."

New Milks

IRS: 'Life isn't fair.' - John F. Kennedy

'Flowers, dinner, and a movie, and that's my last offer!'

"If he's so smart, why does he have to sell his sperm?"

'We met speed dating, had a whirlwind romance...'

'I hear he has no marriage precedent.'

Jim wasn't much of a dater.