Red Wine Drinker Gifts

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

In the Guru District

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'A cheeky red?'

Wine Lady

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

Bacchus.

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Sauvignon Bonk

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

French wine

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

"I think it stopped breathing."

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."