Red Wine Buff Gifts

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

In the Guru District

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'A cheeky red?'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Wine Lady

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

Bacchus.

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Sauvignon Bonk

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

French wine

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

"I think it stopped breathing."

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."