Reckless Driving Enthusiast Gifts

'See the way that guy cut me up?'

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

Man helping a mini learner driver

I love my motor.

"Oh look, that police car is chasing someone! Let me get out of his way. Hmm...he's still behind me. Let me move... That's odd....he's still behind me. I'll move over another lane."

"I hate when a parking spot in the city opens up."

"You can turn your blinker off now, Senator."

Stone Age Driving Test

Name stickers on car windscreen.

"I failed driver's ed....Apparently there's like this rule about rear-ending a police car!"

Person who refuses to admit age on board. Feel free to drive with wild and reckless abandon.

"I've only had eighteen pints and can drive perfectly well osifer...why don't you go and arrest some real criminals?!"

Road Construction Blues.

Student tower pulling along a student driver.

I don't brake for tail gators.

Josh tests his theory that by driving backward through a quick-pass toll lane, he can get money ADDED to his credit card account.

What's in your back seat? Nothing. There's paper everywhere, and dirty clothes, and something that smells like a drunk threw up and then rolled around in it. That looks like ancient cheese. Introducing: The flaw. You haven't cleaned this since the '90s. Big whoop.

"You're very courteous for a hog"

"Aside from the foot, do you think my parking's getting better?"

'I had to go that fast in order to keep that nut from passing me!'

Ed makes his small but vital contribution to the world's daily crude production.

Live To Crash, Crash To Live.

It's The Highway For People Who Hate To Drive

"And now I'd like you to eat a chicken and mayonnaise sandwich shile answering your mobile."

'How was my emergency stop?'

'It's green, you color-blind, flea-bitten bonehead! Where'd you learn to drive?'

"Is it me or is the commute to work getting worse?"

For Those Who Don't Feel That Driving School Is Quite Enough, There's...Driver's University

'Okay. Where's the fire?'

"Today we're learning how to simultaneously drive and talk on the cell phone!"

'I'm getting pretty tired of all these potholes.'

Getting the Finger

'I want some lessons in back seat driving.'

"The Motor Vehicle Department had some concerns for my safety."

" I won't ask how your first lesson went."