Recession Junkie Pillows

Going to Greece in a Handbasket.

Occu-Pie Mars

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"You're fired."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

Neo-International Law

UK border controls relaxed.

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

Oligarchy

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

She was warned. Nethertheless she persisted.

'If only every year was an election year.'

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

Washington D.C., Acronym Capital of the World

Meet the Enemy

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

Laughingstock

"And by president we mean the one on Saturday night tv, not the real one. He kinda sucks."

Trump Poutine

Turkish Democracy

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

"Congratulations, Trumpism. It's ot often we initiate a new horseman."

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

G7 Summit Concern

"My tariffs will move the world in a new direction!!"

'His idea of campaign finance reform is insisting on small bills.'

Barack Obama's To Do list.

"It's called American acceptionalism. We grab more and more of the country's wealth and 99% of Americans just continue to accept it."

"America’s leaders since 1980"

Mission Kinda Accomplished

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.