Recession Humor Fans Pillows

'Of course business is slow. Would we want it any other way?'

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

'Today a ray of hope . . .'

'I think we're going to have to add another storey downstairs...'

'Due to budget cutbacks, we need to get by with less.'

"He is stingy. If he is giving gold it's only because prices have hit rock-bottom..."

'Until this economy thing straightens out, you'll be working out of your car.'

Red Ink: "Busy as a bee, Ted, given the niche we've cut out for ourselves."

'Excuse me, sir, I know you didn't get your bonus, your house is mortgaged to the hilt, you have two kids in college, your employer is facing bankruptcy and . . .'

'You know, you're a real piece of work, Al.'

Recession tips : think positively, remember the sky is not falling.

'In this economy, I don't say anything without first saying, in this economy...'

Ice cube selling penguin out of business.

'Personally, I thin the downsizing went too far.'

'Since I lost my shirt on the stock market, I now only accept strong currency or gold bullion.'

'Sales of new homes are plummeting. I suggest we build old homes.'

'The way things are going in the building trade we are never going to be part of a demolition project in our life time.'

"What do you want to mention first, the senior defections, the profits warning or the aborted takeover talks?"

Vulture sitting on company profits graph.

Bankruptcy court

'You mean there's no money back guaranteed if I'm not satisfied?'

'I'm sorry, Rendleman - But in this economy we just can't justify a company poet.'

"Inflation doesn’t seem so bad to me."

"I never knew you could have so much fun with a global debt bubble."

'We've experienced something of a recession, Mr. Bosworth, but it seems to have bottomed out.'

'Do you remember when we used to do the bump?'

'A recent surge in sales for Red Hot Polish Smokies indicates the highest level of consumer confidence since lunch yesterday.'

'Three wishes? Dream on. That was in the heady days before venture capital and advertising revenue dried up.'

'Hey who approved all this stimulus money for basketball arenas.'

'What's the downturn done to your ho, ho, ho?'

'So, how big was your 'Bail-Out' bonus?'