Recent Move Pillows

'With my parents out of the house, I can finally start my long awaited mural project.'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

"Did you notice how the cables never get tangled!"

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

"This city is becoming unlivable."

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

"Talk about energy efficient...every lightbulb in this house will outlive you!"

"Welcome."

"I'm sorry, honey. I thought you'd be happy that your germ-ridden blanket was such a hit on eBay."

"Aw, Dad! I don't wanna move. I just made friends with a fossil!"

'We can't move in with my parents - they've moved in with grandma!'

A London gent abroad

"I'm afraid you neglected to submit the proper development permit application."

"it appears I'm being relocated"

"We can deliver it Tuesday. If no one's home, we'll just slip it under the door."

Madison Avenue and Maple Street

'Are you two friends?' - 'No, we just hate the same people.'

Filling Cabinet - "Why are all the letters different?"

'I'm getting rid of a lot of crap as move into the next phase of my life...'

House hunting is cruel.

Home Sweet Home

State of the Union

"My biggest concern is adequate closet space."

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"

"I wish there was a way to get out of the city this summer without leaving Manhattan."

House sale.

'Face it, you'd be lost without me!'