Rebel Gardener Gifts

A Vegetable Plot...

"I gotta be me!"

'He works out aggression by bayoneting the leaves.'

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

"What a magnificent display of fall foliage – a blessing to behold." "*!#@!%* leaves!..."

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

'There's a gleam in his eye!'

"I dread these W.I. meetings

Hell's Allotment Holders.

Pyramid Garden

Watering a plant in the rain.

Dead House Plant

Three Circles of Gardener's Hell.

Matador face to face with a Toro lawnmower.

'Congratulations to Sniper Harris on winning Best Floral Arrangement...'

There once was a person who planted a seed

HELL'S TILLERS.

"With the economy the way it is, I thought I'd start a garden. One million vegetables shoudl be enough."

'I decided to pimp my wheelbarrow.'

'I can't shake off the feeling that you're more enlightened than I am.'

"It's just a phase."

'Look - decide. Are you going to launch an attack on tradition, or make a few bob?'

This place already got on my nerves...

'I'm fed up with this hosepipe ban... I mean, it's not like we really need one.'

Johnny Appleseed's evil spawn

'I'm thinking of planting flowers and putting a picket fence from my door out to the highway ... how would that be?'

"I'm claiming diminished responsibilities."

Desert Island Rake

"I never rake all my leaves till all of them have fallen."

"This fish has forced me to confront all the things I did wrong with my last fish."

Garden Centre/Water Shortage

'Oi! Mind my P's and Q's!'

A group of business people stand outside smoking and drinking.

'Garden gnomes from Hell'