Realty Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

I sold our condo in Maui, now I can afford Wisconsin.

'We are looking for a bigger place to accommodate our extended family.'

Real Estate Life

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

"Look, son, real estate."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

'For Sale by Neighbor'

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

Real Estate Personals

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

Home Sweet Second Home.

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

Emigrating to France.