Realism Reader Gifts

What's the forecast?

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

Tired Barbie

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"It's a Wonderful Life" if it was written by scientists.

"You will bargain away what little integrity you have left for what little job security you can gain."

A.M Gorky

"I'm not going to lie. It took a large speaker's fee to get me to say your future is bright."

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

New from Low-Key Press.

City Bar and Grill - "Stop worrying, youth and enthusiasm can't compete with experience and treachery."

'Now stay tuned for 'Hope - Myth or Reality', to be followed by 'Reality - Hope or Myth'.'

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

Woman talking romantically whilst man talks about measuring the scullery.

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

Have you considered a career in travel brochures?

"Could you spare some change for a guy fresh off welfare?"

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

"I have a list of downsides I'd like you to develop into a list of upsides."

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

Inbox and Outbox

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"Say, why don't we go see the Hopper show at the Whitney?"

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

'Because I CAN'T follow my dreams, dummy!'

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

'I'm going to have to let you go.'

Warning Being Alive On This Planet May Cause Cancer

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"