Realism Aficionado T-Shirts

Lance, is that real beer or is it from the prop department? It's from the prop department. However, I should point out that out property master's devotion to realism is unparalleled in the comic strip industry.

Gustave Flaubert.

Marriage Verite

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

"I'm not going to lie. It took a large speaker's fee to get me to say your future is bright."

New from Low-Key Press.

City Bar and Grill - "Stop worrying, youth and enthusiasm can't compete with experience and treachery."

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

"I have a list of downsides I'd like you to develop into a list of upsides."

"Say, why don't we go see the Hopper show at the Whitney?"

"Let’s run through that scene again with just the table and the lamp."

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"Get that de Kooning sneer off your face. This is Turner!"

Modern Charm

'I'm going to have to let you go.'

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

Expectations vs. Bitterness

William S. Burroughs

Gustave Flaubert

Gustave Courbet

'Love gets the credit, but money makes the world go 'round.'

Ventrilominimalism.

"That's Terri and Kip. . . our Imaginators. And over here is Al. He's our Get-real-inator."

Stendhal

"Blank Canvas, White on White, Snow, Artist's Block....I don't know how he gets away with it!"

The Next Big Thing/ The Next Best Thing.

"The robbery and car chase are better in the movie but the hostage situation was definitely better on the cable news coverage."

'...and so, after rehab, Snow White married the prince, and lived one day at a time ever after.'

'My enthusiasm for protecting post-war Iraq has been slightly dampened.'

Marvo The Magician - "Don't disappear your tea's nearly ready."