Ready Meal Lover Gifts

'Pre-washed and pre-cooked I'm okay with but lovingly chewed by devoted carers.....'

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

The Aisle

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"Funny how we never seem to run out of vegetables."

Screen Time at the Dining Table

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

'Come on, stop playing and eat your dinner before it freezes again...'

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

'That's why it's called a full English breakfast.'

'Thaw for 24 hours. They should have told me that yesterday.'

'I'll have the mystery meat with anonymous vegetables.'

'I don't really hate vegetables, but if I eat them, what's next...GIBLETS?'

"mmmmm. Now that's takeaway the way my mother used to order."

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

'Oh... you're gonna eat those peas, mister.'

'What do you mean, you're not hungry? - Your mother spent two minutes cooking that in the microwave just for you!'

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

"Our house wine is abominable."

'For the instant mashed potatoes, the head and serve puddings, the canned cranberry sauce, the defrost and serve pumpkin pie and the delivered roast turkey, we are truly thankful.'

"I miss the old days when my mom would pick them fresh."

"Okay, so what do we add?"

Leftovers Wagon

"What I really feel like having is ham and eggs."

This time, Eddie was going to pay for this.

"The last thing I remember is telling my kids that it would probably shock me if they all stopped texting long enough to eat dinner."