Ready Meal Lover Pillows

'Pre-washed and pre-cooked I'm okay with but lovingly chewed by devoted carers.....'

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

The Aisle

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"Funny how we never seem to run out of vegetables."

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

Screen Time at the Dining Table

"Why do you always have to be so judgemental?"

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

'That's why it's called a full English breakfast.'

'Thaw for 24 hours. They should have told me that yesterday.'

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

'Come on, stop playing and eat your dinner before it freezes again...'

'I'll have the mystery meat with anonymous vegetables.'

'I don't really hate vegetables, but if I eat them, what's next...GIBLETS?'

"mmmmm. Now that's takeaway the way my mother used to order."

'Oh... you're gonna eat those peas, mister.'

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

'What do you mean, you're not hungry? - Your mother spent two minutes cooking that in the microwave just for you!'

"Our house wine is abominable."

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

'For the instant mashed potatoes, the head and serve puddings, the canned cranberry sauce, the defrost and serve pumpkin pie and the delivered roast turkey, we are truly thankful.'

"I miss the old days when my mom would pick them fresh."

"Okay, so what do we add?"

Leftovers Wagon

Family-size meals

'The only frozen asset I have is this ready meal...'