Reading News T-Shirts

'In a surprise move today, everybody filed for bankruptcy.'

"I already know he's gone — it's been on the Internet."

"I get my news online...none of that fake stuff for me..."

'The public aren't panicking about bird flu!'

'According to the surveys nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot...'

'Today on wall street, a rumor led to a rumor which raised fears of insider rumor-mongering.'

Election Fraud

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

"George often read the news on his phone during his tea-break."

"Careful - it might be fake news."

'After a brief advertorial for 'Love thy neighbor,' we'll be back with more or 'kill or be killed!''

Interest rate remain at all time low...

Government and Opposition

"Lying, fighting, bickering, stupidity and attacks. These people are nuts! . . . This is the presidential campaign."

"Trump is president! The sky is falling!!"

'If you don't want to see any more party conference speeches, look away now.'

"Ned's a lot more fun to live with since he stopped believing ANYTHING he sees on the internet."

'Dinosaur extinction'. . . Typical 'fake news'!

"I stopped getting the paper. So instead of going out and getting it for me, he logs onto their website so I can read it online."

Breaking news: Common Sense is Declaring a Panicdemic

COVID Omicron Vision

"On the plus side news is breaking that it is rich in vitamin B."

"So what are we all dying of this morning?"

"I thought you said there's nothing significant in the paper anymore..."

"Happens every time the new polls come out...he Trumps his pants!"

'The bin was kicked over at 3am there is no evidence of terrorist involvement. John Stokes BBC News.'

'Don't worry, Osgood -- Politicians are just as afraid of us as we are of them.'

Journalists Censorship.

The Young and the Politically Active

Today is the slowest news day in 37 years — for a report on that, we switch you to....

'Confusing, dangerous times call for confusing, dangerous leadership!'

'In other news, Martin Bormann came out of hiding today and got into a fistfight with Geraldo Rivera.'

'...And now, the lighter side of the news.'

'There's irony in motion. A Ford Probe is being driven by a Canadian reporter.'