Reading Management Books T-Shirts

'Our budget is being swallowed up bu management costs, if we're to avoid laying off staff we need to make savings...'

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

'I tried that approach once, but my employees seized the carrots and attacked me with sticks.'

The little engine that could delegate.

'I've collected my memos into one reasonably priced gift book.'

"We had to lay off most of the staff to pay for the recruitment and training of new staff to replace the staff we laid off."

"The itsy-bitsy spider went up the corporate ladder. And he didn't care how many lives he ruined along the way. I know, this isn't the book Simon & Schuster wants. But it's the damn truth."

"Effective leadership is more than just telling everybody to be like you!"

New must reading for the rising executive: '7 Habits of Highly Obsequious People.'

Business man reading 'Thinking Outside the Chair'

"Our constantant surveillance indicates workers are becoming more paranoid."

"I have a list of downsides I'd like you to develop into a list of upsides."

"On the plus side, you're on the cover of all the major business publications."

Two businessmen competing.

"He took that kinda hard."

My, my, we're justs a little overprotective of our propriety knowledge, aren't we?

'The company is losing millions and the press are asking questions. Gentlemen,we're looking for a scapegoat.'

'Looks like the cable merger is concentrating too much market in one telecommunications giant.'

'Not a problem. Our industry is self-regulated. In fact, I'm scheduled to jump off the roof right after this meeting.'

'I just wish, he had been more direct...

"He keeps staring at me, do you think he's having some kind of a seizure?" "Managing negotiations Chapter 3...maintain eye contact whilst reinforcing image of strength and warmth."

'Instead of a bedtime story, I'm going to read you my company's report for the third quarter.'

"My greatest asset is my ability to tell you exactly what you want to hear."

"I delegated all my responsibilities, now there's nothing left to do."

'This will give you an overview of our branch offices.'

"Tighten the bolts and slap some more boilerplate on this report, Mike. It's got candor leaking out in a dozen places!"

"He likes to lead by example."

Key Finding From The Meeting: "It was down the back of my chair."

"We are prepared to offer you a compensation package that includes a significant portion of the Western Hemisphere."

'The Healing Power of Money'

"Never, never, never, never give up. Leave that to management."

'He doesn't know the business, but I'm told he has great leadership ability.'

"The thing is, I'm just not a micromanager."

"I don't understand why our retention rates are so poor... we give staff challenging, important work."

'Motivation is critical to success in this company!. . . We prefer the 'carrot' to the 'stick', though. Ha, ha, ha. . . Work harder, b*tch!'