Reading Labels Gifts

"I read all package labels for my health. Now my eyes are shot!"

'I just read the food label. That's why I decided to eat the package instead.'

'Do you remember when food had food in it?'

Man reading dog food can: Contains beef and beef by-products.

'The first dozen ingredients in this cereal are various sugars.'

Let's get organized

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

". . . but he's almost four and he hasn't been labelled yet!"

Sure, I'll take a sandwich

CATCHY NAME

"Sure, ha ha, it’s all ‘free-range’ beef."

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

'What have you got in the way of an imported red that has a label that doesn't look like my cat drew it?'

'Advanced warning: High cholesterol 10mtrs ahead.'

"Do you have anything with FOOD in it?"

Archeology Dept. Storage. Ernie, this box should be labeled "unidentified pottery fragments," not "pots unknown."

Processed foods, unprocessed foods.

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

"Boneless, gluten free, vegan, grass fed, free range, bananas."

Animal Crackers. What a mess! I have to check them all. The box says "Do not eat if seal broken" --- Does this look like a seal to you?

Now With Organic Artifical Additives

Chiantis In Translation

A house is full of signs directing where things are stored.

One of several sugar maple trees is labled sugar free.

Lack of Nutrition Information

"This stuff comes with a prize! If you can pronounce all the ingredients, you get an honorary degree in chemistry."

'What were you saying a minute ago, about not being able to judge a wine by its label?'

All Organic Pork: "Naturally smoked bacon my ass."

'This soup must be loaded with additives. The label says that 'frequent use of this product requires periodic liver function tests'.'

'You have to send in $5 for a decoder ring to decipher the list of ingredients.'

Health food and junk food

Truth in Labeling: 'Snouts, lips, jowls, cheeks and viscera enclosed in intestine and served on a bun, Mustard optional.'

Carcinogenic/Non-carcinogenic.