Reading Labels Gifts

"I read all package labels for my health. Now my eyes are shot!"

'I just read the food label. That's why I decided to eat the package instead.'

'Do you remember when food had food in it?'

Man reading dog food can: Contains beef and beef by-products.

'The first dozen ingredients in this cereal are various sugars.'

Let's get organized

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

". . . but he's almost four and he hasn't been labelled yet!"

CATCHY NAME

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"Sure, ha ha, it’s all ‘free-range’ beef."

'Advanced warning: High cholesterol 10mtrs ahead.'

'What have you got in the way of an imported red that has a label that doesn't look like my cat drew it?'

"Do you have anything with FOOD in it?"

Processed foods, unprocessed foods.

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'

Now With Organic Artifical Additives

A house is full of signs directing where things are stored.

"Boneless, gluten free, vegan, grass fed, free range, bananas."

Chiantis In Translation

One of several sugar maple trees is labled sugar free.

Lack of Nutrition Information

Truth in Labeling: 'Snouts, lips, jowls, cheeks and viscera enclosed in intestine and served on a bun, Mustard optional.'

All Organic Pork: "Naturally smoked bacon my ass."

"This stuff comes with a prize! If you can pronounce all the ingredients, you get an honorary degree in chemistry."

'What were you saying a minute ago, about not being able to judge a wine by its label?'

"Apparently, some of the additives cause a nerve disorder, but others cure it."

Carcinogenic/Non-carcinogenic.

'This soup must be loaded with additives. The label says that 'frequent use of this product requires periodic liver function tests'.'

'You have to send in $5 for a decoder ring to decipher the list of ingredients.'

Health food and junk food

'She read the ingredients listed on the label.'

"Looks like they've simplified the nutritional information."