Raw Food Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Who wants a little treat tartare?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

Raw food, after you leave for work.

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

Vegetarian Birds

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"Your meal sounded nice."

'What are you eating now?'

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

"The special is… pine nut encrusted… filet of salmon… in a balsamic wine reduction."

Thermidor Dali

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

Dad's old fashioned barbeque

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

As soon as he began speaking Manuel's Spanish accent was unmistakeable and he was evicted from the Local food group.

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

'You go ahead and eat. I'm on a raw food diet and surfer isn't part of it.'

Snacks for Learners

"He'd like the broiled monkfish, too, but first he's having a quick taste of the gutter."

Sawdust.

"I bought you a cook book. Think of it as technical support."

'Oh, sure, it gets the creative juices going, but is it worth the cost?'

"Here's to us, kid—and the healing powers of raw juices."

'He refuses to overeat and get plump. Do you think he knows something we don't?'