Rank Riser Gifts

Army Promotions Board. You need to select one of these contenders for promotion to lieutenant colonet. It's like being in college. I have to pick a major.

'That elusive fifth star...'

I believed he started on the shop floor.

Army Barracks

Black Belt/Yellow Belt/Green Belt/No Belt.

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

'Would you feel less inferior if I made you a Colonel?'

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

'Do you think now's a good time to ask for a raise?' - 'I wouldn't if I was you. She gave me one this morning.'

Diner. Breakfast Specials. I'm a type "C" personality. Until I have my morning coffee I have no personality at all.

Hug Your Boss (Use the Opportunity for the Power of Suggestion).

"Five minutes, General."

Sergeant Stripes

'I don't like to waste time. How long on average does it take a recruit to make general?'

"I agree you're due for a raise, and when you leave my office, you'll still be due for a raise!"

'You got a raise? Does this mean some of it will trickle down to me?'

Soldier looking in the mirror and seeing a general.

Echelons 5-15

"Yes, I'm really enjoying it here since my promotion, Joe, and by the way you're fired."

"Then it's agreed. I'll send you a lieutenant in exchange for a clerk typist and a staff sergeant."

'Actually your site isn't one in a million. According to Alexa, it's more like 1 in 2.5 million.'

'I need another raise so I can pay for the car that I bought to celebrate my last raise.'

Man celebrates his Google ranking.

'I believe his website just moved up a place on Google.'

"You really like my arroz con pollo, huh?"

"Dismissed corporal. I outrank you."

'I got the raise - plus a few other things.'

'Is that the picky eater website?'

Guess who's hinting for a raise.

Morgenmuffel

Oil Output Reduced

'I'm afraid that I have to raise the rent.'

'I think I know how I'm going to charge higher rates.'

There's a rumor we may be promoted to corporal.

'A Vice Admiral? Lot of vice in the Navy is there?'