Raffle Hopeful Pillows

'You have lucky blue eyes-fancy buying a raffle ticket?'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"My dad was a prize-winning bull too: According to Mum, he won a raffle once at the local fair..."

'Hold on to this ticket. Immediately after armageddon, there'll be a drawing for door prizes!'

Do It Yourself Stores: Help Wanted

'Suddenly Jake was confronted by the dreaded raffler'

'He's even better when he takes the cue out of it's case.'

'It's so ironic: I finally win a prize at a raffle and it has to be a free pedicure!'

'But Mum, I've got to practise if I want to join a circus when I grow up!'

"Guess who won the meat tray raffle?"

"Nothing says 'Teacher Appreciation' like an administrator winning the raffle."

Cave cow makes grass fire.

"Thank you! And now for my finale, I shall produce a magician from the hat."

"No, it's not a foreclosure. It's my 'Going out of business sale!' Everything must go!"

'Remember to register for the door prize.'

"Believe me. No matter how many self help books you read, you will never become a formula one car."

'Guess what,Doris- I've won you a grass strimmer!'

"The Christmas cake I baked for the church raffle is in the kitchen, I'll go and get it."

Another successful recruitment drive for the Collins University Medical Research Center.

'I'm going to try to be a pro hockey player. So, if I don't return, you'll know I made it, and you can take charge of the marketing department.'

'Alzheimers Society Raffle' "You won't forget to make the draw will you?"

'Like to win an autographed bat,sir?'

There comes a point when you may have to admit the truth: you stink.

'We haven't made a dime all day -- maybe renting an office wasn't such a hot idea after all.'

"Guess what we won in the raffle at the Zoo!"

'I'd rather be in Barnes.'

"Well there's a surprise. For the tenth year running the first prize of a deluxe round-the-world cruise goes to the mayor."

"Hang on Bill, don't draw yet: there seems to be a late entry..."

Giant Raffle

'Before you get upset - maybe he's selling tickets for something.'

BUCKS, next exit...BIG BUCKS, right lane.