Radiologists Gifts

'Your wallet's being stolen. It's good you came in when it first started bothering you. We've caught it early.'

'We thought hiring a 'barium barista' would make patients a little more excited about their fluoroscopy exam.'

Scared husband needs to have scans done in children's exam room.

"Ugh! Moving all our data to the cloud was a smart move, but I've had to hear that stupid pun all week!"

Doctor with funny glasses to patient: 'We don't need a radiologist. My new x-ray glasses allow me to see right through you.'

'He may look healthy on the outside, but he's clearly suffering from Attention deficit disorder.'

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

vaccine wars.

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Our war is against cancer."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

Medical personnel give their hearts

'No, Mr. Simmons, your MR images aren't in yet. We have older equipment, which takes a little longer to process.'

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

Fighting the Pandemic

Who gets the anti-corona vaccine?

"No, I won't write your prescription legibly...you'd just google it and ask a lot of dumb questions."

"Unfortunately, there's no cure—there's not even a race for a cure."

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Pregnant women having a ultrasound done.

Scientist counting microscopic things he can see in his microscope

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

Corona Funeral

"A CAT scan? Are you sure?"

Wilhelm Rontgen's first attempt at X-rays: shining a bright light through Madame Rontgen.

When bacteria trash talk to antibodies. Oh yeah?! You and what course of antibiotics?!

'It's nothing that a few stem cells and 75 years of research can't fix.'

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

"How long before the clinical trials are over?"

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'