Radio Show Aficionados Gifts

"No one knows his identity. He just turns up, cuts your grass, then departs without leaving his name. They call him the Lawn Ranger."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

Pre-Television Man Caves

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

"Did you hear Sadie's show today?"

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

'I'm Bored'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!"

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

"Ray Brown on bass, Elvin Jones on drums, and Alan Greenspan on interest rates."

Randi Rhodes

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

"What is it with Garrison Keillor and rhubarb pie?"

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

On the air: Clown squirts Glenn Beck

Unsound

"First caller is Rudolph, from the North Pole, you're on Rudolph. What's your problem?!. . . And before you speak, lt me just remind everyone that I spent ten years as a detective specializing in tracking down prank callers and mercilessly destroying their self-esteem."

'Michelle, this is your brother, Paul, do you copy? Over...Paul to Michelle, do you read me?...'