Radio Fans Gifts

Are you one of the millions of Americans who has wanted to get advice from me, Dr. Sadie Cohen?** **Not actual doctor. Now you can! Starting today, I have begun accepting requests for personal advice via email. Write me at asksadieshow@gmail.com with questions about your love life, career or whatever other subject you'd like me to ridicule you about. Did I say ridicule? I meant counsel.** **She meant ridicule.

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

Non Thought For The Day.

Untold Love Stories. The Shadow and Pollyanna. It's no use, Lamont, you know what evil lurks in the hearts of men and I believe there's good in everybody.

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"This just in — I no longer have a job."

Sports Radio in Crisis

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

Not-so-easy listening...

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

Larry King

"He had a request for me on the radio today. He wanted me to bring him a cup of tea."

'I'm Bored'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. For the next two hours, I'll be taking your calls. I'll tell you how to fix your hopeless relationship or cope with all the people at work who really are better than you. Then I'll berate you for not manning up and dealing with it on your own instead of bugging me about it! Los Angeles, CA, you're on. What's your problem? Click.

'No, the big rabbit Harvey isn't Paul Harvey -- at least I don't THINK he is.'

'He's got a lot of talent and everything, but I just don't think he's cut out for talk radio.'

"No one knows his identity. He just turns up, cuts your grass, then departs without leaving his name. They call him the Lawn Ranger."

"Mmm... now WHERE did i leave my radio..?"

Books recommended by Oprah and Howard Stern.

Ask Sadie is back. You're on, caller. What's your problem? My wife finally answered my emails. She wants me back. She says she's sorry she left me for her personal trainer. She said making mad, passionate love to him has become unfulfilling. She said she's tired of the excitement, tired of his fancy house, tired of the lavish trips around the world, and tired of him not snoring like a jackhammer, like I always do. Let go and move on, you ninny!!! She said she's especially tired of his ability to

Welcome to "The Ask Sadie Show," pre-Halloween edition. First caller is Zombie Eaton, from Schenectady. What's your problem?! Munch

"What is it with Garrison Keillor and rhubarb pie?"

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

As a doctor I can only tell you that the jury is still out as regards the benefits of cannabis in a medical context,however it is my personal opinion that this particular sample would make one bitchin spliff.

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

I think I may have a Jekyll-and-Hyde personality, Dr. Kapuchnik. I'd say you're more like Dr. Demento and Mr. Potato Head, Al.

What's your question for "Ask Sadie"? My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry. What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance? Simple solution: send your mother to Japan where their entire culture reveres the elderly. Sayonara, grandma!!! Are you sure that's not a just a stereotype? Who cares?!

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

Randi Rhodes