Talk Radio Fan Gifts

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

'Now stay tuned for 'Hope - Myth or Reality', to be followed by 'Reality - Hope or Myth'.'

Men discussing a book on a chat show

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

"He had a request for me on the radio today. He wanted me to bring him a cup of tea."

"So, colony collapse disorder - how funny is it?"

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

"Well I think the Real question is..."

'He's got a lot of talent and everything, but I just don't think he's cut out for talk radio.'

"I see myself as a lot like Garbo, but very much a people person!"

Books recommended by Oprah and Howard Stern.

Retired Talk Show Host.

"What is it with Garrison Keillor and rhubarb pie?"

As a doctor I can only tell you that the jury is still out as regards the benefits of cannabis in a medical context,however it is my personal opinion that this particular sample would make one bitchin spliff.

'So...you claim Farmer Jones kept you locked up naked in a dirty sty, fed nothing but garbage and repetitively called you a filthy swine!'

"Emotional breakdown! Call Oprah!"

Life is better with a laugh track and graphics.

'Alan's claim to fame is that he was once a Jay Leno punch line.'

"Frankly, that sounds like the sort of thing a cat would say.."