Racketball Player Gifts

'I hurt my hand playing racketball, so you may find this prescription to be surprisingly legible.'

Ratminton

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

"I hope you're good, Charlie. I've only played a couple of times."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

'And now for my William Tell shot.'

The Off-Season

I love tennis

'Big advantage!!'

"...and how do you feel about being labelled the new Great British hope?"

'Since Darwin said it's survival of the fittest, I thought I'd better take up an aerobic sport.'

"Strategically speaking, your best move is to let him win."

'Let's practice lobs again.'

'It's an old badminton injury.'

"Now if he'll just swallow one more paddle we'll be set."

'That's 12 games in a row. As my best friend, it wouldn't kill you to let me win one every once in awhile.'

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'for what we are about to receive...'

"Umm. . . Hello? I'm over here!"

'He wasn't too keen on you returning his serves.'

"How do you respond to critics who say you only play the backcourt?"

'The swelling well receed in a few days and the racket should slide right off.'

I love badminton.

'...I was aced, defaced, disgraced and replaced.'

'Could you help me on my grunting.'

"I still think badminton is as fast as tennis..."

'Look here Frobisher, you've adhered to the rules. You haven't cheated, self-aggrandised or whined about money. That's rather unsportsmanlike of you.'

'I'm umpiring the game - lifeguard's over there.'

Anyone for tennis?

Spider Tennis