Racehorse Enthusiast Gifts

"I had no idea you were still racing him."

''Am I Going Crazy' to win in the 4.30.'

"You want motivation? I'll give you motivation: if you win your races, you'll reture on a stud farm, but if you keep on losing, it's off to the knackery!"

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

Pony express. Pony express yourself. Pony express yourself so much he left.

And you will know it has all be worth it when he's up and about again.

"They haven't mated yet, but I think we're getting close."

The Epsom Derby - The Finishing Line

F&E Stables. Horses Boarded. The owner of this horse is a huge fan of the late musician, "Prince." That explains the purple reins.

Man in office on saddle: 'You heard right. I just got hired as a desk jockey.'

'Look Daddy: I'm wearing Mummy's shoes...'

The Epsom Derby - Bookies

The Epsom Derby - Omnibus in Motion

Gentlemen Riders

'I think I felt a foal. Why don't we run a blood test to be sure?'

"A horse by any other mane would small as sweat."

'What's founder?'

First past the post.

Horse takes its owner for a walk.

Knight sees sign near castle: 'Prince's Parking, All Others Will Be Toad.'

"The first thing we have to do is get you up there."

Horse racing puns

Stubborn Horses

"She just loves them - she's a total girl horse."

'Impressive resume, but frankly, in your line of work, people just want to check your teeth...'

"I'm a huge proponent of control over speed."

'I can't stand to see an animal in pain....'

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

'I'm stressed: My dad was a champion, my mum was a champion, there's a lot of pressure on me to become a champion...'

"Hundreds of eggs a year, and I've never seen a vet. The Mare has one foal, and it's the Mayo Clinic."

"So then in comes this good-looking French vet from Vétérinaires sans Frontirères."

'When I drink, I don't drive my car.'

Stout gentleman: 'That's the way to get over a gate! I don't think you left me so far behind that time.'

'It's a hybrid.'

'I sort of drifted into this...I always wanted to do children's gymkhanas.'