Race Day Dreamer Gifts

Loser's Podium.

"Howard's gone on the Tour de France without his bicycle again."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

Cycling Race

Smile

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

A day at the races

Bob's Driving School.

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

"Okay...tell me again what training seminar we sent Bill to?"

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

First past the post.

'I can't take Barbie to Show and Tell...she doesn't have a thing to wear!'

'Homework done only $1.00' 'Homework eaten only $0.50'

'He's in training for the marathon, he watches it every year.'

"He has extremely advanced motor skills."

Football Bomb

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

"This baby can take you from zero to cardiac arrest in 60 seconds!"

"And, folks, if you'll take a look out the right side of the plane you'll see a cloud that looks exactly like a pirate."

"Let him sleep. When he wakes up his nightmare will begin!"

The Tortoise and NASCAR.

'I was looking for something more passive-aggressive.'

'I hear the meeting was cancelled last Saturday.' - 'Yeah. Someone drugged the hare.'

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

"I'm delegating my New Years Resolutions, you'll be running a marathon in July!"

Race Horses See Big People.

"It's only a 2-k race, but in the 10 years we've sponsored it, nobody's ever finished."

'It happens to a lot of runners at this stage of the marathon, George. It;s called 'hitting the wall'...'

Hurdles with Steps

"I can't believe we forgot to pack the car."

'Ha! Fake out!'