Race Car Humorist Gifts

'Uh, No, Greg. The Magna Carta is not a formula one race car.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

CLEAR!

Volkswagen Scandal

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

"Don't you ever run off again to get your oil changed without telling me."

'Beware of SUV.'

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

'It's a British car. Needs braces.'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'Think Basics.'

All you'd expect in a British car!

'Told you so.'

'How was my emergency stop?'

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

No Hand Signals

Person who refuses to admit age on board. Feel free to drive with wild and reckless abandon.

Lucky car.

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

"Hey, this is a marathon, not a sprint."

"It's a hybrid if you think it is. Runs on gas and the power of positive thinking."

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

"..and I've recently had it converted to LGP"

My car idles well! It learned a lot from you!

'It doesn't work...'

"So tell me about your early years on the road..."

"And hold the mayo."

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

Frog rearview mirror ornaments.

"I got a 'millennial anti-theft device' in my car." "Steering wheel lock?" "Stick shift."

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

Road rage in the car-to-car technology era.

Tin man visits automotive oil change facility.