Quiz Show Fanatic Pillows

'Hi Peter, it's Chris Tarrant here, from 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire?''

'Exams are not like they were in my day.'

This is your soul we're talking about, Mr Bagley! Please stop shouting 'DEAL OR NO DEAL' all the time!

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

Astral Projection

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

Academic Jeopardy - "The great unknowns and cosmic uncertainties of the universe are reduced by this number daily."

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

Morgue - "Welcome to 'Celebrity Autopsy'"

Out of Context Nite with Jeremy Clarkson.

"If Shakespeare were alive today, he would be driving this make of Sports Utility Vehicle."

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

"Next riddle without looking it up, can you tell me which is the routing number and which is the account?"

Bob Monkhouse

"Perhaps we'd be more likely to reach an agreement if the British delegate would stop shouting 'Deal or no deal' all the time."

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

"Apparently he told Chris Tarrant it was just enough to pay off his mortgage!"

Alternative Game Shows: Shooting Stars

Punctuation Weather

Academic Jeopardy - "Reality divided by two gives us this truth."

"Binge-watching squirrels. What are you doing?"

"Can you tell the class how you spell Albuquerque?"

"Meaning of life!!" "Meaning of 'Game of Thrones' series finale"

'Then in the next round, I said to Carol, vowel, consonant, vowel, consonant...'

Celebrity Clerk: Schrodinger's Cat.

Universe Challenge

"It's like 'Family Circus' meets 'The Wire,' but on a cruise ship."

'How can I enjoy 'Jeopardy' when she keeps blurting out the answers?'

"No conifering, please."

Studio 51

"Angry or Hangry?

'And your specialist subject is the Invisible Man films?'

'Hi, I'm here to apply for the EXTREME make over talk show!'