Quirky Wordsmith Pillows

'Please sir, I did give you the correct answer. But, you gave me the wrong question.'

'The best the grotty magus could do was produce a footy pagurid.'

Shakespeare Ave

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

Best Seller

'Actually, I don't get out much. I spend most of my time alone, writing lyrical novels celebrating nature and the interconnectedness of all living things!'

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

Mother Goose's Haiku

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

"He belongs to a lawyer."

A Poet

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

You trip on it, you buy it.

'He never listened to his mother!'

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

"What's 'ET' short for. . . ?"

Sharp Eyes

"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."

"I'm the writer-in-residence."

Bagel problems.

"Wow, I cannot remember what I was saying."