Quirky Trip Planning Pillows

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

"I just..."

Italia tours

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

The Airport.

Western Outfitters.

"We were thinking about the Himalayas this summer. On the other hand, there's something very special about Montauk."

Mad For It

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

'People are staring at us because they've never seen private box seats at an off broadway theatre before.'

'Round-the-world ticket please!' - 'One way?'

'We leave for France tomorrow. I just can't wait to visit all those famous museum gift shops!'

"Can you folks handle firearms?"

Bath Abbey

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

"Where should we fly to for our next vacation?"

Desert Island Statues wearing bucket hats.

'Any bargains going South?' (Bird asks travel agent).

Summer

'...and ski conditions will be excellent on city streets today.'

'When the airport said they were booking us on a different flight, I thouoght we'd still be going to Albuquerque!'

"Let's just enjoy our holiday. The whole incident with your stalker is over now. We won't see him again."

The sun luring people to the sea

'Don't worry, have a nice holiday, I'll cover for you: Once cockadoodledoo at sunrise, any idiot can do that!'

Drinking hurricanes in New Orleans

'For a little extra we can allocate you a seat inside the aircraft.'