Quirky Sportsman Gifts

Discus accidents.

The Cricketer and the Golfer

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

Snooker Golf.

Alternative fielding positions

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

Boomerang cow.

The Unsportables: Relay

Footballer and Bacteria.

"Must you use the cat's litter box to practice your sand trap swing?"

Monster Baseball

'He hasn't played a game yet, but there are people who have started whinging about him already.'

Gopher underground hit by golf tee.

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'Bob likes to express himself through his art!'

'Now that should make it a lot easier.'

Deregulated Baseball

Skier.

'Yes, Ralph, they are nuts, but...'

'McWit never could build anything level.'

'Let go of the pole!'

Curling Rocks!

A man walking a bowling ball is about to walk into a woman walking a bunch of bowling pins

"Hmm, offhand, I'd say you have a nasty case of tennis elbow!"

'What the . . . no wonder we can't gain any yards. We've been fitted with radio collars...'

The steeple-chase. Man reads a sign stating that no horseman is allowed to follow the racehorses over the course.

The 'twice twirl surprise' seamer

The McKinsey conjoined quintuplets find their niche."