Quirky Show Fan Gifts

"That's what I call an off-off-off-off-off Broadway show!"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

Theatre Masks and Butts

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Odd Angles,a monthly strip on coarse angling.

Introducing...Anagraman.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

Scene from 'Night of the Koala'

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

'Check out the old dude.'

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

"Got any bathtub gin?"

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

"I can't come in today, I'm feeling like myself."

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

The Pencil and Sharpener

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

"POOPIN'! It's the Butt Signal!"

"Leon, honey, you break all the rules of dramaturgy."

"Big n' tall" "Small n' long"

"He's deliciously vintage."

Hot cross buns

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

Before they settled on water, shower pioneers experimented with a number of alternatives, including spaghetti,

An Extraordinary Pointer

Mouse with a cat cake.

'I like the litter box...but the pool has gotta go !'

'...And the best he can do is a bunch of gophers?'