Quirky Pet Narrators Gifts

"I try to drink a lot of water, stay up and get right on L.A. time, and never eat the airline food."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

'She's just great with the children.'

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

Around the Dogbox in 80 Days.

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

"Teach me not to care."

"Really, Larry? Of all the things that could have bitten you, you get a wereduck?"

Noah's Ark Book Shop has two doggie doors.

Cat and Dog both eating from wrong bowls.

"It's the dog."

"Stop playing dumb, young man. I wasn't pulled out of a hat yesterday."

Happy Birthday to you... Thanks guys!

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

"When I was your age I would have snagged that before it hit the ground."

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

"Is your regret that there were three of them or that they were blind?"

'Why in the world do you want to log on to the vet doctor. who did a 'fix' job on you?!'

'Tarzan'

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

"I kid you not, he shot that duck right over the middle of the lake and said 'fetch'! Do you have any idea how cold that water is?!"

'I don't get it. He had the smallest paws in the whole litter.'

"Well, team-sports are rather difficult to organise around here: Just keep practising your bilboqiet Darling..."

"It'h thnowing. . .me no like thnow in thpring. . . "

"My owners named me Kvduer92hybH20UDF8fhsj becuase they wanted to remember a strong password for their online banking."

'Farm News' readers want to know about my childhood? Rather normal really: Lived in a pigsty, ate swill every day...'

"Didn't you find it attractive that he was a "Free Range Chicken'?"

'Not so easy, is it?'

Aesop's Fables - Dog and His Own Reflection

Hooked on fried sardines, Irene's cat leads them on a life of crime.

Your parents created a talking gerbil to save their marriage? That's the gist of it. And it didn't work. They found that a talking gerbil can't help people overcome their real differences. It's all my fault. It's all my fault. If only I'd been a better rodent. Oh, how I used to talk back. Too weird. Still like me?

'Unfortunately The Hounds of The Baskerville were my role models.'

'Well kiddo, I'm proud to say that in all my years of service, I've never lost a sheep...'

"I came as soon as I heard."