Quirky Performer Appreciator Gifts

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

'He's maturing early.'

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

"And do you have any OTHER skills you can bring to the post apart from being able to burp the Beatles greatest hits?"

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

The songwriter who wrote a bridge about his bridge.

The Dancing Academy

"Hire him. You can't teach shadows like that."

'Yes, Super-Supreme pizza... Delivered please...'

"Here's another one about Teddy bears."

A true musician will learn to improvise when his instrument is in the pawn shop.

'My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references,'

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

"I owe my success to him. I figured, if he can make it, so can I."

Long necked giraffe playing long saxophone

'Have you got to have a Gimmick.'

Jumbo in Henrik Ibsen's The Wild Duck

"It might be a better trick if you didn't use see-through glass"

"I don't get you. You can soft shoe, play the ukulele and juggle, but you can't fetch a pair of slippers."

"No-chance the rapper"

'My mum can play the piano by ear.'

Alison Pill

'Dr Seuss is awarded a PHD.'

"My daughter tells me that you work in the entertainment industry?"

'...open beer bottles with his teeth.'

"Are you binge watching again?"

"Okay. . . Where DID the elephant go?. . ."

OWZAT...The beer-mat-flipping champion sets a new world record!

'Mentoring requires many sophisticates qualities and skills...'

'I like your style - How would you like to do some public service announcements?'

The man who could throw his voice.

"Wow, Tia Carmen...that's amazing! How do you do it?"

Musician with eyepatch