Quirky Observer Pillows

"We understand each other and respect each other's privacy." "That cat hates me."

'That's a nicotine patch and the other one is a patch to curb my cravings for nicotine patches.'

A Special Person - man explains to psychiatrist how his special perception leaves him friendless.

Caution: Stuff and things next 4 miles

"Look...it's the Perez twins."

Woman on Widow Walk Watching Golf

'It looks like a rare 2008 Marks and Spencers!' - twitchers of the future

"I can't believe they allow bowling in their apartment."

'Good news. They're looking at seed catalogues.'

Twitcher.

Returning socks into the wild.

'It's the first time I've noticed you have one arm longer than the other.'

'Cor! Look at the arse on that.'

A Peeping Tom.

'Shooting buffalo? From my train? Cameras, maybe; guns, heck no!'

Pyramid Garden

"Y'know, I'd say that the Game Warden really isn't your biggest worry anymore."

Lefty Grange, Color commentator.

"De plane! De plane! De bird! De bird!...."

"They put hot pepper in the bird feeder to keep squirrels away, but it attracted these dorks."

Last night I was in a seafood restaurant and I noticed that all of the sliced lemons were wering shower caps. That's so that when you squeeze the lemon, it doesn't spray your dinner companion. So I was told. My point is that as long as there ar people putting shower caps on lemons, I'm not as crazy as I thought I was.

Hand sanitizer. Evil hand sanitizer.

"Sir, would you mind changing places with me?"

All-Christopher Neighborhood, Westport, CT, 1988

A man in a bat mask watches a superhero get changed in a phone box

"A plumber fixes a sink showing his women's underwear."

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

bird interprets modern art

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

Penguin

Mother Duck.

'Thank goodness for clumsy children: A spilt ice-cream!'

Scientist seen on loch.

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.