Quirky Lover T-Shirts

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

"I love you, you big fool."

"You must be a computer geek, because I've never had anyone ask me to accept their 'Terms of Use' before a date."

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

"Great tights!"

'I even love the way you snore!'

'If it wasn't for you darling - I think I would go crazy!'

"I'm gona level with you, Judith, I've spent some time in the pen."

'As a hairdresser, I must say you take it a bit far.'

"I'll kill you if you crack your knuckles again."

The Mad Hatter finally gets taken down.

Freak Family.

"So, Mr. Igor - why do you want to be a laboratory assistant?"

'I think I met Frank at the circus.'

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

'...and to you, he has left his leprosy.'

"Your being boring, stuffy and predictable is part of your charm."

'Cannibalism has always repulsed me - until i tasted Aunty Judy's knees'

Flatware Follies.

'No, it's not one of those fake arrows. I had my head pierced.'

Ass-less Chaps

'Never mind what big eyes I have. Just get on with the bloody eye test!'

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

For years Melenie stayed home waiting for the stirrup cords revival.

"No, it's not a religion or a cult. It's a fashion statement."

"What did you expect from a budget airline?"

Paradox in the Wardrobe...The mango mail-order boxy pants were very, very, very roomy as advertised, and yet they were somehow confining.

"Well of course it's unintelligible. I'm an English professor!"

"Is this some kind of a put-on or what?"

"For goodness sake, Wilf, trim your eyebrows -- they think you're one of them!"

'Of course you can stay the night-what d'you fancy-on top or underneath?'