Quirky Kitchen Decorator Pillows

'Get off me you Crepe.'

"Gourmet burgers on rustic platters - coming right up!"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

Filet minion

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

Cake Free Zone

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

Pinata Trophies

The Hammer

"Can that be right?"

Yard Sale

"I'd like to have my teeth scrimshawed without being, you know, harpooned."

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

'Okay, kids...time for your bath.'

An assortment of vegetables in the form of Tables

Santa 'Freezing' Claus.

Rogue elephant

"You love anything tacky, don't you?"

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

"Oh just ignore him!...he always shows off when we have visitors!"

Frankenstein's Reading Light

'On today's market a property like this could fetch 175k... but with themed rooms, stone cladding, avocado bathroom suite and garden gnomes, you're talking closer to 95..!'

Leonardo Da Vinci's Cat

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

'I'm very proud of my El Gecko.'

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

'It's a coffee-book table.'