Quirky Invitation Lover Pillows

Party Tonight: Bring a bottle.

The devil you know and his plus one

Peel poker.

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Fred, Sam, Brian, John, Walter, Jeff...."

'I'm not very good at mingling.'

"Happy new year!"

Inuit post arriving by parachute.

Celebrate National Submarine Day.

"Dammit, Hopkins... It's the fiscal new year!"

"Your being boring, stuffy and predictable is part of your charm."

'I think I met Frank at the circus.'

"I didn't know I was SUPPOSED to R. S. V. P!"

"This part of space feels especially weird right now."

'They're our neighbours. We invited them on the off chance they may turn out to be post-modern.'

Snake Charmer

'I adore a man of many parts.'

"And so, by the ventriloquism powers vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife."

"We're having cocktails, you should come by!"

"I love what you've done with that punch bowl Reginald!"

Hospitality.

"It's OK, darling - Granny's crying happy tears."

A sign in the front window of a bookstore says "Meet the Pope 2 p.m."

Castaways at Christmas

Crater Lake Annual Yogurt Guzzle! This year's flavor: Raspberry Marijuana.

Birthday at the Urinal Cakes Factory.

"I think mine likes yours, too!"

"Picture this: it's my birthday, my mistress comes towards me with a cake and then, she sets it alight! I was so scared I've been feral ever since!"

'Hi. I'm Major Fixer-Upper.'

COMPUTER DATING SERVICE, 'How about a nice fixer-upper?'

Always looking for ways to increase sales, the creative team at Mayflower Greeting Cards brainstorms new sending occasions.

"Now that I've seen this, I don't think I can ever enjoy popping bubble wrap again."

My Name is Lucky.

"Could you help me pick one that looks nice? I've never been good at that."

A Redneck Christmas