Quirky Home Improver Pillows

A botched home improvement job.

Punk painting his walls 'White with a hint of puke'

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Tool Box

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

Conservation Area

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

"Mulch madness"

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

'Well, that's fixed that.'

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

'Okay, kids...time for your bath.'

The Day Dreamer.

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

'Please excuse the mess. The interior decorators are in.'

Beware of the Lawn

Unicyclist painting a ceiling.

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

Man's best friend

'It's a coffee-book table.'

'I wasn't to know it's a live shell officer, we've been using it as a door-stop for years!'