Quirky Home Finder Pillows

"This place is perfect. It must have been built for us."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor,'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

Beware of the Lawn

'I'm sorry, but there's nothing in the zoning regulations covering bad taste.'

For sale sign: 'Unique 16th Century cottage. Similar properties wanted.'

"I can now fetch anything you want - on Etsy."

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

'We live in a designer trainer.'

'No, we did not order a corner unit.'

All items on the premises have been marked for identification: 'My cat sprayed everything in the house.'

"Well, as a matter of fact, no, you didn't tell us you kept exotic pets when you sold us the house!"

"The smaller horn is really a satellite radio antenna."

"It's got everything: northern exposure, hardwood floors, central tree."

Coming Soon: Haunted Homes on 60-foot lots.

"My home insurance has dropped since I had it installed."

"You rang?"

'Oh, it's perfect, George! And it has termites, too!'

'It's no spelling mistake-the dining room is in the basement.'

Unusual Staircase

"Can I suggest a hoarder's house? It's perfect for a young family of rats to move in and share with the current owner..."

"Interesting story behind this one..."

"The one's an en suite and the other's a walk-in wardrobe."

"When you said you lived in a fishbowl, I just assumed you never got out."

Homes of the font designers

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

"I bought a new summer condo."

'I'm sure a little baking soda will freshen it up in here.'

'And every spring, a koi pond shows up in a corner of the basement.'

Junk Mail Shredder.

"Buy a bunch of these tiny houses. When you need something bigger, they're stackable!"