Quirky Home Buyer T-Shirts

'No windows. You wouldn't want windows in a town like this.'

Igloo For Sale: No Termites! NO Carpenter ants! NO fleas! No mice! No rats! Absolutely pest free!

'A new concept. The inside out house.'

'Mr. Jones? I've found a house that fits your funds perfectly! It even has a little garden!'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"Not to mention the park view."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

Mouse real estate!

Beware of the Lawn

An exaggeration of estate agents

'I'm sorry, but there's nothing in the zoning regulations covering bad taste.'

'No, we did not order a corner unit.'

All items on the premises have been marked for identification: 'My cat sprayed everything in the house.'

"Well, as a matter of fact, no, you didn't tell us you kept exotic pets when you sold us the house!"

Strip Mine Estates - Mineral Rights? They're All Yours.

'Do we want this one parallel with the floor or the ceiling?'

"It's got everything: northern exposure, hardwood floors, central tree."

"My home insurance has dropped since I had it installed."

"Can I suggest a hoarder's house? It's perfect for a young family of rats to move in and share with the current owner..."

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

'And this is the sunken living room.'

'And every spring, a koi pond shows up in a corner of the basement.'

Junk Mail Shredder.

'Buy this house and get two wonderful neighbours!'

Catchment Area for Teachers

'Problems finding good, affordable housing?'

'The owners are prepared to accept any reasonable offer.'

"I decided to buy a tiny house."

A women is testing her House to see if it's Pregnant with a 'Home Pregnancy Test' kit

"This model is priced higher, but it comes with glow-in-the-dark stars."

'Good evening sir,I'm doing a survey on home security.'

'In return for storing the nuclear waste, we get a big break on the mortgage.'

"It's all I could get."