Quirky Gourmet Gifts

"People don't care what they're eating as long as they're the first ones to eat it."

"You suppose, somewhere out there, there are peanut butter fish?"

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

(No caption). Woman looks at cookie sheet which contains two cookies. One is a frowning gingerbread man whose arm, leg and part of its stomach have been bitten off. The second cookie is a smiling gingerbread man who has a very full stomach.

National Mosquito Day

'Pigs feet, sir? 'ARE THEY PICKLED?'

"You and your habit of asking for strange meals."

Cannibal chef.

'Ooh look, you've got a free lucky horseshoe with your giant meatballs.'

Sushi

Doctor's recommend a well balanced diet...

"I haven't been game enough to give it a try!"

Sandwich Shop

"And for dessert we offer death by chocolate, after life sponge, or the damned for eternity tart."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

"Everything tastes better when it's cooked on the grill."

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

"The meatloaf just tapped S.O.S. in Morse code."

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

Bangers and Mash

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

GMOs: The Next Generation

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

Stupid Microwave

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

Tzatzikicicle

"All our vegetables are organic, ethically sourced and stunned before being boiled."

"Who ordered the moose en croute?"

Kentucky Fried Horse

Amy Sedaris

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"