Quirky Finance Geek Pillows

'How many pension fund managers does it take to change a lightbulb...?'

The day the stock market went UP.

Great Chinese Dynasties

Mario Draghi

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Thanks to the financial business scientists know it for sure now - Black Holes really exist!

"... And to our friends in the Liberal Democratic party I award thirty pieces of silver."

The Shrinking Dollar.

Slipping and sliding down the slope...

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

"One question, what's a share option?"

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"Jerry's blood pressure jumped to a six month high on News of the dollar's weakness."

"Post holiday sales look similar to the crater that killed the dinosaurs."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

Cheer up, you'll get your day.

"At least we're consistent ... "

'What do you mean, the chart resembles an iceberg?'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

The Decline of the Euro.

'I think it's time to reboot your fiscal compass.'

"Italy just bought France."

Euro Bait

"I was sent on a fact finding mission. Now I'm accused of insider trading!"

'In the interests of full disclosure, federal law now requires me to inform you that I own shares in the winery whose product I am serving this evening.'

"No, unfortunately I won't be raising your debt ceiling."

The End of Trump?

'Due to current market conditions, I'm recommending that my clients invest heavily into pain medication companies.'

R. Jones: Investment Advisor - Out Chasing Yield

Dangers of Inflationary Fiscal Policy

'The National Debt just sounds like it's a lot of money because it's such a large number.'

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

'Actually, we were hoping you could loan some money to us.'