Quirky Expression Collector Gifts

Things You Say When You Are Officially Old - Volume # 2

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Raincloud Umbrella

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Duck Hunt

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

Best before 65 million BC.

Sauce for the Goose

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

Ice shelfie.

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

Inflating Boobs.

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

It's great for pulling the birds!

"Things are looking up!"

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...